It's Video Mashup Wednesday!

While I'm trying to figure out how to keep a Decade in Review to less than 100 inches, you watch this sweet Year in Pop remix:

Little help?

I've got a couple of sizable projects coming up that the unwashed masses (that's you) could really add to.

• The first and most urgent is a recap of the The UC's most memorable stories of the decade. We've got a pretty good list going here, but I know we're going to forget something we really shouldn't have. So if you've got a few ideas, throw them my way. Fast. It's running at the end of the week. (I know, I know! Why did I wait until the end of the 10 years to put this together?)

• The second is a Legislature preview package. We're thinking five days running with one story a day. You know: budget, ethics, who to watch, yadda yadda yadda. Anything you guys want to arm yourselves with before the session starts Jan. 25? The deadline here is a couple of weeks out.

And if none of that interests you, head on over to Plunderbund and read this take on the Detroit "terrorist" attack. To the blockquote!

Al Qaeda seems almost miffed that we aren’t panicking.  I can’t really recall Al Qaeda so loudly and immediately claiming credit for any attack, not even 9/11.  And yet, they’ve done so here, praising testicle toaster as a failed martyr, making him a banner headline, because the American response isn’t giving them enough ink.

And if you break out in hives when you read progressive blogs, enjoy this comic instead, in which a clown cries: [UPDATE x2] Damn blog dimensions. Click on the image to see the whole thing. HA! Amateur coder 1, Blogspot 0. Wider Two Column Modification courtesy of The Blogger Guide
Though fonts seem to have declared war on the Grinder this morning. And I need to fix that freaking top pic.

Monday Cup o' Joe (or The smoke grenades fit perfectly in the cup holders!)

It's the cold caffeine edition!

• You get my full Jason Chaffetz recap from a two-hour interview at Baileys in Orem. (The roast beef actually tastes like roast beef. It's like the world has gone crazy.) Early returns on the story indicate that Republicans love him for voting no on everything that would expand the federal government and the other 17 people in Utah County think he's a clown. I suggest we put together a bi-partisan statement that both sides have valid points to make.

• The Trib tracks Rep. Chaffetz down the day after Christmas to ask if he still stands by his TSA porn bill after the whole Al-Qaeda Junior Membership Initiation thing in Detroit. Of course he does. Also, THE GUY'S DAD WARNED US. Who the hell is in charge of this country?

So go ahead and don't let us use a laptop for the last hour of our flight, and by all means if your crappy food is keeping us in the restrooms built for midgets a little longer than usual, feel free to freak-the-hell-out.

• The Herald's intrepid reporter Caleb Warnock warns us of more billboard pollution along I-15 because of wording in a new law that's favorable to companies that are inclined to distract drivers with massive advertisements.

And if none of that interests you, find 10 minutes today to watch this Top Gear UK review. If you can't find the 10 minutes, then make them instead. You won't be disappointed.

Be sure to drink your Ovaltine

There are two kinds of Christmas shoppers at this point: You're either freaking out about not having gone Christmas shopping (Hi, Patrick!) or your sitting back, enjoying a mug of hot chocolate and thinking to yourself "I still have one day of shopping left."

Either way, you didn't eat two huge bags of Mother's Circus Animal Cookies like I did. So let's just say I win, you lose and let's go back to what we were talking about, which is Jason Chaffetz.

The Right Honorable Representative from Utah's 3rd District (the Fightin' Mo's!) sat down with me yesterday for an end-of-the-year chat. The story will be coming out probably over the weekend, but one thing keeps coming back to me: The guy hasn't done anything wrong for an entire year.

I mean, there are a few Dems in the county who don't like anything he does. And the whole ACORN/Census-PostOffice/Earmark-"reform"-proposal/Yankees stuff was over the top. But he's passed a few reasonable bills, made a name for himself in social media, and has an active base.

Sigh.

One more thing: I don't think he's running for Senate again Bob Bennett. He hasn't made it official, but he doesn't sound like he wants it. It really may boil down to the fact that the House simply suits his style better.

And if none of that interests you, break out your secret decoder:

Wind sprints!

The legislative session is just a month away, and that can only mean one thing: TWO-A-DAYS!*

For my second post today, we're going to discuss consensus numbers. It works a little something like this.

Governor's Office: "We really think we should put down no more than 200 puppies this year."

Legislative leadership: "That's nice. It really is. But it's clear that there is no way the state can survive unless at least 500 puppies are no longer breathing at the end of the year."

Governor's Office: "500 puppies? No way. We've looked at the numbers and while 200 may be a bit low, there's just no way we can snuff the lights out in the sad eyes of more than 350 young doggies."

Leadership: "Fine."

So the number that is trotted out is somewhere in the middle, but not what either side wants or often even thinks. The governor's office, which is worried about public perception will often try and soften numbers,  while the Legislature, which is worried that people will actually think they have souls, plays hardball. A couple of real-world examples that don't involve puppies:

• The governor's office is thinking that the current year shortfall is still around $150 million while lawmakers figure it's closer to $194 million. The consensus number is $183 million.

• This one is for the six of you who really like to dig into numbers. The Bush tax cuts are set to expire in 2012. That'll mean mostly a federal revenue increase when they're rolled back. But Utah gets a one-time revenue bump because people with any holdings still left that are worth anything are going to cash out. Thus proving again that no government anywhere knows a damn thing about managing rich people and their money. From Kendall Oliphant over at Thredgold Economic Assoc: "They'll work to minimize their tax burden under any situation."

But I'm getting off topic. The governor's office has that one-time revenue somewhere in the territory of $100 million for the state. I mean, holy crap, $100 million in one-time money from rich people cashing out holdings before they get hit hard with higher taxes. There are some wealthy people here.

Legislative leaders figure there will be a bump, but it ain't $100 million, and ain't ain't a word. Seriously, what school did you go to?

Anyway. I haven't had lunch and it's going on 2 p.m. So how to wrap this up? With Russian Pac-man vs. Russian Mario, that's how:



* There is no guarantee that you will get two posts a day out of me. That's not to say you won't get two posts a day until Jan. 25.

Monday Cup o' Joe

• So, the ethics piece finally found it's way out the door. It focuses on the broad definitions in the initiative and how they would impact people in unexpected ways. I'm already getting a little push back on using Mormon bishops in the lead, but tell me this, how else am I supposed to get people to read a 60-inch piece about a 21-page bill that dissects legal language? Right.

• From the You Don't Think About It Until Someone Tells You file: Band teachers apparently have a high rate of hearing loss. Makes sense, I guess. I was a trumpet player through high school and we would play just as loud as we could because, well, those uppity clarinets seemed to always get the attention. But things can be done to cut back on the damage such as custom hearing devices and actually designing band rooms for, you know, bands. Rep. Black up in Sandy is taking a look at solutions.

• Ben McAdams will replace outgoing Sen. Scott McCoy, D-Salt Lake City. McCoy is heading out to focus on his career as a high powered attorney. (Props to the Trib for apparently finding McAdams' high school senior photo.)

• Speaking of the Trib, how did I miss that they axed the Out of Context blog? Shame, that.

And if none of that interests you, watch this 5-minute short and join me in a big "Ah, hell no!" at the end.


Alma from Rodrigo Blaas on Vimeo.

ABC 123

So the House took a look at the governor's $11.3 billion budget yesterday and declined to take a "no tax increase" pledge. Sen. Steve Urquhart is gathering up pledges on his side of the building and is somewhere over a dozen.

He needs 15 to block any tax increase (without a corresponding decrease elsewhere) in the Senate, which effectively blocks it everywhere. Much easier than getting the House in line — though it was the House that lead the anti-tax charge last year, nearly defeating the auto registration increase until I-15 expansion through The UC was dangled over the edge of the abyss.

So Senate Republicans are caucusing today to discuss the budget and we'll see where that goes in a few hours.

And of course, Gov. Gary Herbert has said he wants to do the 2011 budge without a tax increase, though he dodged a question about whether he would veto any such increase.

A couple of proposed increases include:

• The tobacco tax. This one is viewed as the low-hanging fruit because the majority of Utahns wouldn't actually feel this one. And cigarettes stink. Could raise $30-$50 million.

• The sales tax on food. Remember the good ol' days when they lowered the sales tax on food in the name of the poor? Yeah, well, now a group of lawmakers say that since everyone buys food, that makes the sales tax one of the most steady forms of income. So to sum up, tax the poor to provide services for the poor. *brain goes pop*

And if that doesn't interest you, check out what the kids are doing these days:

Monday Cup o' Joe

• While I slug back some caffeine (if it's cold, it's not sinning!) and a few ibuprofen, you go on over to the Trib and check out their massive series about a refugee family and murder.

• Then, when you're drained and sobbing, read about Gov. Herbert's plans for the $11.3 billion state budget. Also, the longer that ex-Gov. Huntsman is across the sea, the more we hear about how much lawmakers really didn't like the way he was running the state. I mean, Gov. Herbert signs an executive order to cut 3 percent and suddenly he's the second coming Decisive Budget-cutting Guy vs. Huntsman costing the state $2 million a day while he decided what to do last year. The only thing I worry about is that when everyone in government is on the same page, someone is getting screwed somewhere.

• There's been a lot of talk about the ethics initiative that's currently gathering signatures. Less talked about is the boundary initiative that would set up an independent commission to draw Utah's political lines. I'm a bit torn, philosophically speaking, on boundaries. If your lawmaker is doing something you feel is unethical, you can vote against him/her. So a check exists.

But if a lawmaker can essentially decide who will be voting for him/her through boundaries, a voter's options are taken away. And Utah already has a history of really, really nasty gerrymandering. So, anyway, torn a bit on that one. And while you're thinking about it, read this little piece about Why I Oughta!

• If you're looking for some opinion outside the Greater Salt Lake No One Else Exists But Us Metro Area, make your way on over to Charlie Trentelman's blog/column at the Standard-Examiner. I worked with Charlie for six years and while you may not agree with him, the guy's been around the block, deals with real Utah sources and real Utah issues. Here's his blog, you'll have to poke around for his columns.

Monday Morning Cup o' Joe - In 'n' Out version!

• U.S. Senate race:
In - Mike Lee. (Shhhh, it's not official)
Out - Mark Shurtleff and Fred Lampropoulos.

• Jobs:
In - Taking retirement while working the same job.
Out - Taking retirement because you're actually retired.

• Being awesome:
In - Being a pioneer when most of us think of it as pushing handcarts.
Out - Turning left with the sun in your eyes.

• College footballs suckery
In - Same bat game, same bat time. BYU in Vegas Bowl.
Out - TCU. As in out in the cold. Stupid BCS.

• Presents and Almond Roca
In - It's the most wonderful time of the year
Out - The War on Christmas.

• Orrin Hatch on good governance
In - Revising history
Out - Actual history

And if none of that interests you, perhaps tricking jail guards into believing your Mary Jane is a tomato plant will.

It's slippery out there

I get it. I really do.

You're a candidate for U.S. Senate and you've got to stake out some territory and Sarah Palin makes sense to you. You've got to stake out some territory because while you'd like to be the next Jason Chaffetz, it's not exactly the same thing, you know?

We explored that a bit on the Grinder and you know how it goes by now: Yes, Bennett's flank is weak. The base is looking for an alternative to the establishment, but they're not crazy, so they're looking for someone legitimate.

You need to come in and take this thing in convention because unlike the 3rd district race, a primary against Bennett is nigh unwinnable. But cottage meetings aren't going to be enough because this is a statewide delegate race and Bennett's a nice guy. So you start looking for ways to get yourself out there — for ways to find some traction. Get Chaffetz to an award ceremony unrelated to the campaign, but hey, let's announce the thing in an Eagar for Senate e-mail and don't mention it's not an endorsement. Also in an Eagar for Senate e-mail, announce that you'll be at the Palin book signing in Utah.

"will be there to support Palin's book tour and looks forward to meeting the former Alaska chief executive."

But, you know, as someone who just bought a copy of the book. Like everyone else.

So here's the thing: My kid and I were in Costco a while back. He's a big fan of the Fablehaven series — what with the creepy witch and the gums and the drool and the knot — and author Brandon Mull was going to be there signing books. Thing is, we were in a hurry and didn't have time to wait in a line that was maybe a couple of dozen people long.

So the boy finds where Brandon's at and slowly backs toward the table until he's as close as he can get without being totally obnoxious, if you know what I mean. I take a couple of quick snaps with the cell phone camera, and we're off.

So the next day with his friends, it's all "I got to meet Brandon Mull and got my picture taken with him!"

Cherilyn Eagar, you're one very small step ahead of that.

Also, I didn't dub you "Utah's Sarah Palin." Your supporters did that and I conveyed the message. Because I'm the messenger.

Find your traction somewhere else.